Jane Barbara Yourish

Jane Yourish — a beloved wife, mother, mother-in-law and grandmother with a brilliant sense of humor and a smile that lit up every room — passed away unexpectedly on Sept. 19 following a stroke. She was only 77.

Born on July 26, 1948, Jane was the eldest child of Myer and Madeline Ezrin. Myer and Madeline were both children of Jewish immigrants who fled persecution in Russia and settled in Boston.

Jane spent her early years living in a Quonset hut on the campus of Yale University, where her father was pursuing a Ph.D. in organic chemistry and Jane attended nursery school.

The family had very little money, and Jane was used to being told they couldn't afford common things. When another child once asked why her family didn't attend church, she simply shrugged and said: "I guess we can't afford it." (They were Jewish.)

After Jane (and her father) finished their studies at Yale, the family settled in Springfield, Mass. Jane graduated from Classical High School and went on to attend Fairleigh Dickinson University in Madison, N.J., where she met the love of her life: Stuart Yourish, a young man studying accounting who grew up in the Weequahic section of Newark, N.J.

Jane and Stu first spotted each other across the room at a party early in Jane's freshman year. It was love at first sight.

The two "Strangers in the Night" — their theme song — soon became inseparable. They got married and had a daughter, Karen. Stu's work took them overseas to Switzerland and France when Karen was an infant. Jane perfected her already fluent French and learned to ski in the Alps. They eventually returned to New Jersey and welcomed a son, Brian, into the world.

By all accounts, Jane was the best mom in the world, the mom everyone wanted as their own. Much of her parenting magic happened around the kitchen table. It was there that she checked in with Karen and Brian during the week — asking questions about their day and offering comfort and guidance when they needed it. On weekends, it became a hub of laughter as the kids' friends gathered, drawn in by Jane's warmth, magnetic storytelling and signature silliness. One of Karen's friends dubbed her "Mama Y," and the name stuck. From then on, she really was everyone's mom.

"She filled her home with so much love and laughter that her children grew up strong and kind and open to the world," Heidi Eitel, Jane's daughter-in-law, said at Jane's funeral. "Her life was in many ways very ordinary, but the vibrancy with which she lived it is nothing short of extraordinary."

Jane balanced work and motherhood at a time when that was far from the norm. In the 1970s, she lectured for "Lean Line," a diet program launched by two New Jersey women. Jane's undergraduate degree in education was never realized in the classroom. But her disposition and those skills took her far in the workplace. She was a natural educator. She trained bank employees and later became a customer service manager for New Jersey Bell Yellow Pages. This was during an era when the printed directory was published just once a year and even the smallest mistake could lead to major frustration. Jane could soothe the most irate customers with patience and grace.

Jane's capacity to care extended far beyond her family and work. She devoted countless hours to helping those less fortunate. She tutored and mentored children in Newark, N.J.; taught an adult how to read after they had slipped through the cracks of the school system; staffed a suicide hotline; and served meals in soup kitchens.

And when her granddaughters, Madeline and Cymia, came along, she seamlessly transitioned from being the best mom to being the best grandma. She hosted tea parties with their dolls and stuffed animals, shared sweet inside jokes and cherished every detail of their lives as if they were the most important people in the world (and to her, they were).

Jane invented secret languages — codes, winks, and inside jokes — with many who were lucky enough to know her. Even in the ICU, she found ways to communicate her love. She smiled and laughed until the very end.

"Whatever was happening, wherever we were, whoever was there, Jane had this completely unreal talent — through a joke, through well-timed nonsense, or exaggeration — to help everyone see that there is a parallel world running right-up-next-close to ours," Jane's son-in-law, Eric Roston, said in his eulogy. "This world is a little bit funnier, a little bit more playful, a little bit more adorable. And it's always there whenever you want it."

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